A little over a week ago, I did something I thought I would
never do. I moved to Waco, Texas, four and a half hours from my home, the place
I’ve lived since I was born. This was a big step for me considering at this
time two years ago I was convinced that I would never be able to live further
than Houston, two hours away from home. Yet, here I am! God is good and He has
made it clear over and over again over the past year that this is where He
wants me to be. He has given me the amazing opportunity to attend graduate
school at Baylor University to get my Master’s degree in Social Work. I am
taking two classes right now and will be taking four in the fall and spring,
along with doing an internship at a girls’ home for 20 hours a week and acting
as a research assistant for at least 10 hours a week. It’s going to be a
challenge; but I’ve been nothing but ecstatic about it for the past few months!
I love adventure, and that’s what I’ve been looking at this as. Unfortunately, the
excitement only lasted until I got here last week.
My parents came with me and helped me move into my
apartment. All was going well until Wednesday afternoon as the time grew closer
for them to leave. I realized, “I’m about to be alone here where I don’t know
anyone and I don’t know where anything is!” Suddenly, all I could think about
was how intense this program is going to be and how much I miss my people back
home and back at Lamar. All I wanted to do was get in the car and go right back
to Nederland. The tears began to fall and they didn’t stop until late that
night.
Let me back up for a second. The week before I moved, I had
the privilege of going to preteen camp with our church as a sponsor. I got to
spend the week at Pineywoods, my favorite place, with some of my favorite kids.
The theme for our week at camp was “Focused.” All week, we learned and talked
about the importance of keeping our focus on Jesus. One of the things the
pastor talked about was the importance of staying focused on your mission. We
are purpose-driven people; we need something to work toward and give us meaning
in life. It’s what keeps us going. I often think about the importance of being
mission-minded, but I completely lost sight of it in my despair this past week.
Ironically, I have been referring to my year in this graduate program as
Mission: MSW (Master of Social Work.) My mission right now is to obtain my
degree and impact as many people as I can in the process. When it comes to a
mission like this, I can get easily overwhelmed and give in to the enemy’s lies
telling me that I can’t do it. Another thing the camp pastor talked about was
the importance of putting our faith in Jesus and not in ourselves. It reminded
me of the place I was in two years ago right now. I was battling intense
anxiety and got to where I couldn’t drive. I was completely convinced I would
never get past it because I simply didn’t have enough faith. Thankfully, a
sister in Christ reminded me that it’s not about how much faith we have, but
Who we are putting our faith in. He is able to accomplish ANYTHING through us.
He gives us His strength when we can’t do it. It’s all about Him. I needed that
reminder desperately.
For a little while, I started to regret that I had gone to
camp the week before moving. I thought I had given myself less time to prepare
and lost valuable time that I could’ve spent with my family. Now, I see that I
was right where I needed to be. I needed to hear those messages just as much,
or maybe even more, than the kids did. The truth came back to me this week when
I needed it the most.
This past week has been hard. It has been a difficult
transition and I cried/fought back tears all day for the first four days. I
just wanted to go home and kept telling my mom over the phone “I don’t want to
be here!” I was particularly distressed on one of those phone calls and told my
mom to tell people to pray. If you don’t know, I come from a church family full
of prayer warriors. As one of the men in our church once said, “When those TBC
prayer warriors get after the devil, he runs!” It’s true. We are a family and
we come together to support each other. In addition to that, I have so many
amazing family members, friends, former professors, and others who continually
encourage, support, and pray for me. I have definitely felt that over this past
week, so thank you all so much. I’m still not completely at home here and I am
still nervous about the huge task ahead of me, but I’m feeling a lot better.
I’m reframing my thoughts and starting to enjoy myself more. Again, thank you
for all of your prayers and encouraging words. Please keep them coming; I still
have 9 ½ months to go!
Yesterday, one of my professors gave us a paper with these
words written on it:
Don’t be frightened by the size of the task.
In between the big words is this verse: “Be strong and
courageous and get to work, for the Lord my God is with you. He will not
forsake you. He will see to it that everything is finished correctly.”
1 Chronicles 28:20
So, I am going to be strong and courageous and do my best to
stay mission-minded! I encourage you to do the same with whatever the Lord has
placed in front of you. Come see me if you’re ever in Waco 😊
Now for the pictures...
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